Over this weekend, we will learn to be careful what we wish for, know that even strippers can become movie stars, wonder if we have a long-lost sibling, ask ourselves what will happen after fifteen years of marriage, and ponder who keeps paying to see Tyler Perry films. Enoy!
Ted: In one sense, Seth MacFarlane’s new film Ted echoes his animated sitcoms Family Guy, American Dad, and The Cleveland Show inasmuch as all the casts of characters include a talking something: dog and baby; alien and fish; a bear, respectively. This advent of a talking teddy bear doesn’t doom this film to failure. Instead, it’s kind of clever, asking What if those wishes I made as a child came true? Is it possible I could live life as a fully functional adult if I had a Ninja Turtle shell growing from my back? Would my potential sword-fighting acumen and ability to shoot lasers from my eyeballs be coveted skills on a CV? Maybe, maybe not, but Ted might also turn out to be an allegory about the refusal to grow up amidst the shackling connections we fashion to the past. What looks most intriguing about Ted is that MacFarlane, for the first time really, has been tasked with telling a straight narrative without the numerous, often superfluous, tangents that construct his cartoons. This is not to say that Family Guy and American Dad haven’t had their funny moments (I’m still not sold on The Cleveland Show), but most episodes are vignettes strung together, often using tired pregnant pauses or repetitive actions. For posterity, I’m sure MacFarlane will employ a flashback or two, but live action is a bit less forgiving, especially after 90 or so minutes.
Magic Mike: For those of you unable to catch this film before it is booted from theaters next week, not to worry: a musical is in the works. Seriously, and why not? If people get hot and bothered over vampire porn and 50 Shades of Meh then why wouldn’t a film about male strippers be USDA prime chuck for carnivorous eyes? While I can’t see myself buying a ticket for this movie, I’m intrigued in that it’s directed by Steven Soderbergh. On the one hand, I’m wondering if he owed someone a debt; on the other, the movie may have just moved from ninety minutes of irony to something more poignant. On the other, it could also be a vehicle for Soderbergh’s ego, making this more akin to the more appropriately titled The C-Tate Experiment.
People Like Us: Siblings unaware of each other meet upon the sudden death of their mutual father. I’m not sure how much this movie has going for it aside from the inevitable surprises worked into the script as plot points. In general, if a movie begins with a life-altering reveal, then the only place to go from there is the divulgence of secrets, and life-affirming conversations. Chris Pine and Elizabeth Banks are generally solid, so this People Like Us might be less V.C. Andrews, and a bit more Jeffrey Eugenides.
Take this Waltz: Michelle Williams follows up her Oscar-nominated turn in My Week with Marilyn with a film about a suburban love triangle. Seemingly formulaic, Take this Waltz follows Margot (Williams)and her sudden attraction to Daniel (Luke Kirby). The issue of course is that Margot is married to Lou (Seth Rogan). Providing that Lou is not an alcoholic malcontent who works out by punching his wife in the back of the head, the story could be far more intriguing in that it would seem to explore the fluctuations and intensities of a long-term relationship, something that is often lost on film. Much of the time, films about love triangles are predicated on one of the couple being an ass. If this isn’t the case, then the triangle must impel an act of violence or revenge. Here, the relationships come across as sincere, if not sincerely stuck in marital entropy. (As a cynic, this is kind of a recommendation to see the film; plus, Williams is characteristically amazing in most everything she does.)
Tyler Perry’s Madea’s Witness Protection: Three times, I typed the title of this movie, and each time I mistakenly typed Witless. I’m sure this is a subconscious phenomenon, one that bespeaks to my absolute befuddlement as to how and why Tyler Perry is still able to make movies. His humor is lost on me, and his faux-poignancy is simply obnoxious, as is the character Madea.
